Lady Cee [name changed for safety] a 43-year old Nigerian woman was subjected to all manner of physical and mental abuse by her husband’s kindred after she was seen having sex with her girlfriend.
By Mike Daemon
In Nigeria, lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer [LGBTQ] people are considered taboo and the discriminatory laws against homosexuality paves the way for all sorts of violence against sexual minorities to thrive.
Lady Cee, a bisexual woman who was based in Port Harcourt until she had to flee the country for her own safety, said the incident was one of the most horrifying moments of her life.
In a conversation with NoStringsNG after the incident, she said her whole world crumbled after she was caught having sex with her girlfriend by Greg [name changed] her brother in-law at her husband’s village.
Being outed and facing the shame
The incident happened January last year.
“My sexual orientation was a top secret, something I have always kept hidden from a lot of people given the country’s stand on homosexuality, but all of that changed when I was caught by my brother in-law At Anambra state.
He was around the back of my husband’s house and then saw me engrossed in a passionate smooch with my girlfriend whom I had invited over”
After the discovery, she was reported and eventually summoned by her father in-law who had set up a committee of elders to investigate her.
The investigations required that she travels back and forth to the village which eventually led to her being fired from her prestigious job for non-performance.
On December 26, she was found guilty and part of her judgment required that she undergoes ritualistic ‘cleansing’ at the village square.
“I was pronounced evil by my husband’s kindred, stripped naked, and my beautiful and cherished long hair was shaved off. The humiliation and shame was just too much for me to bear, that I had to crawl on my knees begging for their forgiveness while my husband watched all of it” she said.
The aftermath: dealing with trauma and threats
After the whole experience, Lady Cee said she was left traumatized and even had to reach out to a psychologist for help whilst still in Nigeria.
But all did not end there. She was frequently threatened by Greg – her brother in-law who seems to have taken the whole issue personal.
“He kept calling and texting me. The last of it was when he called and said: We will hunt you and chase you like your evil shadow until you are tired of living”
She said that she was summoned again and asked to appear before the elders last month, but she is no longer in the country and so missed that meeting, however, she has been informed by a reliable source that her son will be taken from her.
Lady Cee who is now in Canada, said the humiliation was just too much for her to handle, hence why she decided to flee the country so as to find a way to heal.Have something to share? Ready to tell your story? Contact us.